The Fabulous Red Diesel: Blog

i have definitely missed my vocation as an ad writer. i entered my cat in a whiskas competition, where you had to send a photo of your moggy post whiskas , and add a witty strapline which would be used in an advertising campaign. So i took a photo of a semi-recumbant Mr Pom Pom on the decking in the sun , and under it composed the following ; ahem;

'When you are entertaining the ladies, don't give them second best.. offer them Whiskas... guaranteed to get you pussy, aye '

Now I thought that was worth a years worth of whiskas but obviously not as some dull as ditchwater tabby won it with something as entertaining as ' pebbles eats up every bite' yeah right very original.

But i have probably found the ad firm who would appreciate my talents. The latest ad for the latest ladyshaver from a well known razor firm. Picture the scenes here- a lady walks past various pieces of topiary, and as the sways by they each become neatly clipped- get it........ a bush trimmer, ...BUSH TRIMMER!!!!! I nearly fell off the sofa and I hope to christ i don't get any misshaps with the shears or that will surely smart like a bitch.

I thought I'd seen it all when Isaw the first tampon ad, but this was way better.

I think i will leave you with a small poem set to the music of my old man's a dustman by my dear friend Steve

oompah oompah oompah oompah x2

O my old mans a gynocologist

He likes to cure the pox

he decorates his hallway

through the letterbox

I thank-you.

Kat